This is most often seen as a customary fact now a days. Modern women are scared of committing in a relationship and what do they have to say for this. Well, they say that there are no eligible men anymore and the struggle is still on. Let’s see how much truth there is, in this fact.
Contrary to what woman now a days tell, I know a lot of men that are young, handsome, single with flourishing careers, fit and healthy on a look out for a serious relationship. These comments are straight from one such guy I spoke to. When asked to what extent was the woman he was seeing ready to commit in their relationship, he said that, “ I have been wanting to settle for a long time now but women seem to be a bit too interested in their careers. What they actually look for is just a casual lover who can take them to place in a big swanky car and spend huge bucks on them. They just don’t seem comfortable with high levels of commitment or to put in other words, they are just not ready to compromise their new found strength for anything under the sun.”

So we see that modern women today don’t want to compromise their freedom even for the emotional solace that this young, good looking man is ready to give him. If we look at this issue from a sociological point of view, we’ll see that this viewpoint is not limited only to a few men. Most eligible men now days confront the same issue. The fact is there are a score of young, talented men ready to commit but are unable to find partners. What is important to note here is that, there is no major difference in the number of single, available men and women and so we don’t face an imbalance.

So what is going wrong?
The prime factor is the social change. The social emancipation of women has been refreshingly vital and in the last 15 years. The moneys earned by women in present times have increased. We see more and more excelling academically and have moved into the mainstay career domain. A career has meant financial liberation allowing women to purchase their own apartments and cars and whole self-sufficient lifestyle unheard of two generations previously. And what’s more? Today women are able to conceive later if they want to. They also enjoy a sexual liberty unparalleled in modern society.

Hence it has nothing to do with men being less capable or women being more forward. The social change has had a rippled effect and hence men can be called as subtle victims to this change.

Many single (men & women) and even married people face deep rooted fears related of commitment. The more emotionally intimate a relationship becomes the greater the feelings of uncertainty and doubt become for commitment phobic people.

Fear of commitment can be due to various causes such as a separation of parents, divorce, and death, poor role models, witnessing offensive relationships as a child, a previous unfaithful partner, fear of rejection or simply fear of loosing ones freedom.
Creating a strong, steady and loving relationship means being able to overcome anxieties, fears and insecurities of such nature. It is essential if you want the relationship to continue to combat your fear of commitment.

Here are some steps to fight the fear:

First and foremost acknowledge that you actually do want to share your life with someone. Discuss your life objectives and dreams together, as well as revealing inner selves to one another. Doing so will enhance trust, closeness and intimacy.

 Next is to acknowledge your fears, recognizing that you fear commitment. After this try to find the cause of this fear, a failed relationship, your parents divorce, loosing your independence etc. Only once that you have isolate the cause of the fear can you work it out. Discuss this fear with your lover so that they can understand and also so that they can help out. (Maybe they have overcome the same problems)

Try taking small steps towards commitment with your partner i.e. exchanging apartment keys-going on a long holiday- living together etc. If your partner is commitment phobic it would just strain and eventually break the relationship if you try to hurry them into committing these steps, take it sloe and easy.