In the book, dating secrets of the ten commandants, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach says the first thing to keep in mind if you are looking for a spot of successful dating is to make your date feel special. And yet there are times when all that and more leave you ‘dateless’.

Could it be that you are trying too hard? Are you a desperate lover? Read on to find out:

Scenario 1: you are at a party when this hot chick bumps in to you accidentally, smiles and says ‘sorry’.

What you do: you flash an equally brilliant smile, run after her and try some not-so-sophisticated pick up lines and ask for their phone number. They decline not so politely and move away, making you look like a fool.

Scenario 2: you are with a blind date that happens to be gorgeous and you feel the chemistry rocking. All you need to do is to play your part with finesse and she will be yours.

What you do: but you chatter away non-stop, in a bid to impress her, forgetting that you should listen too. You never see them again.

Scenario 3: you are at nightclub dancing your blues away when someone who is a terrific dancer catches your attention.

What you do: you don’t know the meaning of restraint, so you end up trying to dance as close to her as possible and end up brushing against them. They are not too kicked about all this unwanted attention but you are not one to take ‘no’ for an answer. So, you promptly get down on all fours, trying to please them. But all that happens is that you are left cashless and lonely.

Scenario 4: last night’s date was fairly successful, so you tell each other that you’ll meet up soon.

What you do: and then the next day onwards, you start calling her up till they start wondering whether you are really crazy types and they fib to you that they’re going out of the country. You are left in the cold again.

If you want to shed the ‘desperado’ tag, just follow these rules:

Rule1: stay cool. No matter what happens, even if your date runs off, do not run after her.

Rule2: don’t call immediately after the first date. Call after two to three days.

Rule3: if someone isn’t interested, just cool off and get lost.

Rule4: don’t get down on all fours trying to impress. Your date will wonder why you’re so desperate.

Rule5: cultivate confidence and a sense of humor. That will help you sail through potentially embarrassing situations.

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This entry was posted on Sunday, November 23rd, 2008 at 1:12 pm and is filed under Love. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.